Pokémon We Could Beat Up #8

This is Pokémon We Could Beat Up #8

This is a bi-weekly column from Chris and I where we go through the National Pokédex and talk about whether we could beat each pokémon in a fight.

There was no post on Friday as we were preparing for site maintenance, so enjoy two posts in one day.


Feeling very confident today, this looks like a lineup that is going to pad our stats.

036. Clefable

Height: 4’03”

Weight: 88.2 lbs

036 Clefable icon 256x256px (ico, png, icns) - free download | Icons101.com
via icons101.com

CHRIS: Clefable is so stupid. Once again, this Pokemon was supposed to be so special, and it isn’t. I really have never seen this in a battle. I think I could take this down easily. There is nothing that scares me about this Mon.

STEVE: Trying the sprite art out this week, I love the art of the old Pokémon games. I don’t want to beat up a Clefable, why must I do this. I would take a Clefable down with ease but I wouldn’t enjoy a single second of it. Just look at it! It looks so friendly, it wouldn’t hurt a fly.

037. Vulpix

Height: 2’00”

Weight: 21.8 lbs

037 Vulpix icon 256x256px (ico, png, icns) - free download | Icons101.com
via icons101.com

CHRIS: This feels like an easy one as well. Vulpix is so cute, but just a little fox. I would be worried about Vulpix being too fast and blasting me with fire. All in all, it is very small and one hit would likely do a lot.

STEVE: From bulbapedia, the Pokemon Wikipedia; “Vulpix is known to feign injury to escape from opponents too powerful for it to defeat.” I think I can make quick of a Vulpix but I need to watch it very carefully because it may be able to catch me off guard when I think I won. This doesn’t change the outcome of the battle but it’s something to watch out for.

038. Ninetales

Height: 3’07”

Weight: 43.9 lbs

038 Ninetales icon 256x256px (ico, png, icns) - free download | Icons101.com
via icons101.com

CHRIS: Listening to all the big words Steve said, I am also taking the loss. Ninetails is much stronger than the previous opponent. I am not sure I would have the best chance even without Steve’s tidbits.

STEVE: Via bulbapedia; “Flames spewed from its mouth can hypnotize an opponent and its gleaming red eyes that are said to give it the ability to control minds.” I’m going to start linking little tidbits of information about each Pokemon because stats don’t tell the whole story, on paper I should destroy a Ninetales but hypnotizing flames and mind control eyes don’t make for a walk in the park. I’m going to have to take a loss here. If I get burnt to a crisp, hypnotized or put under mind control, none of those options are paths to victory.

039. Jigglypuff

Height: 1’08”

Weight: 12.1 lbs

039 Jigglypuff icon 256x256px (ico, png, icns) - free download | Icons101 .com
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CHRIS: My only real memory of Jigglypuff is the TV show. She would just put people to sleep and leave. That is what I would expect if I was to be put to sleep. She would probably lose by DQ for just leaving.

STEVE: The only offensive capability Jigglypuff has is putting its opponents to sleep, but that isn’t going to do anything. If I can resist the soothing song of a Jigglypuff I can easily beat up a Jigglypuff. Even if it puts me to sleep it has no way to hurt me, even if this fight takes days I see no ways for Jigglypuff to beat me.

040. Wigglytuff

Height: 3’03”

Weight: 26.5 lbs

040 Wigglytuff icon 256x256px (ico, png, icns) - free download |  Icons101.com
via icons101.com

CHRIS: This is just a tall rabbit. That does not worry me at all. It could be fast, but what is it going to do to me? I’ll pound this thing into the ground.

STEVE: I don’t know about this one, same offensive capabilities as a Jigglypuff but a bit larger. I don’t see a loss here, maybe I’m being too overconfident in my abilities but you have to have faith in yourself.


CHRIS: 4-1 again. I want to get to a point where every Pokemon is up in the air. I think I am 1 more win positive from Steve.

STEVE: 4-1 today and after 40 fights I have a record of 28-12. I’m going to need to take my wins where I can because as we get further and further into this the fights are going to become a lot tougher and our losses are going to rack up very quickly.

New fights every Monday and Friday 5:00 PM EST. Gotta beat em’ all.

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