Pokémon We Could Beat Up #23

This is Pokémon We Could Beat Up #23

This is a bi-weekly column from Chris and I where we go through the National Pokédex and talk about whether we could beat each Pokémon in a fight.


116. Horsea

Height: 1’04”

Weight: 17.6 lbs.


STEVE: Easy clap. I’ll strangle a Horsea to death. W.

117. Seadra

Height: 3’11”

Weight: 55.1 lbs.


STEVE: Horsea, meet bigger Horsea. NEXT! W.

118. Goldeen

Height: 2’00”

Weight: 33.1 lbs.


STEVE: This must be a joke or something. A big goldfish? What’s next, an even bigger goldfish? W.

119. Seaking

Height: 4’03”

Weight: 86.0 lbs.


STEVE: My only concern with all these water types is how I would hit them because fish and aquatic creatures usually move very fast. Fortunately, we have the luxury of fighting all of these hypothetical battles on land so any advantage a fish might have doesn’t exist. I’m 4-0 right now let’s see if we can make it 5-0 on the day. W.

120. Staryu

Height: 2’07”

Weight: 76.1 lbs.


STEVE: I’m being bold today, I’m calling for 5-0. I’m not letting a big starfish beat me up. W.



STEVE: As I said earlier, these sea creatures may have an advantage underwater but that advantage is gone in these hypotheticals. Have you ever seen a fish out of water? It doesn’t do very well now does it. 5-0 on the day and 63-47 after 120 battles.

New fights every Monday and Friday 5:00 PM EST. Gotta beat em’ all.

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